this is my job

a couple days ago at work, i walked up to my boss and presented a plea. i write the nuts & dried fruit order, so i'm in charge of keeping these little guys on the shelf:













which is easy, because no one ever buys them.


i hate these things. they are awful and too expensive and stupid and i told my boss i didn't want to order them anymore.






to that, he said if i ate three of the little packets in two minutes, the deal was on. so, i sat down, ripped open the box and dove right in.



the trick is that these little flakes are covered in some kind of powdery something that immediately coats your tongue making it almost impossible to swallow without a beverage of some kind. also, when you're chowing down as fast as you can in the backroom, coworkers begin to watch you and say things that make you laugh, so you have to walk away and chew all alone in a corner.



but.
i finished.
without barfing.
and now i will never order those disgusting things again.
ever.

and, yes. i was on the clock while all of this went on. i have the best boss on the planet.